Why Is Dating A Taboo For Most Africans?

I am just curious, is dating just for white people?

Have you ever wondered why African parents are so against their children dating? Is dating a taboo in the African culture? What is it about dating that is so wrong?

I understand some parents are over protective, strict, think their children are not mature enough, and some are simply afraid of teen pregnancy etc. But, parents need to understand that the dating process is something young people want to experience as well.  In terms of relationships, is it not our experiences that shape who we are? Is it not our journey of discoveries that help us achieve maturity?

In retrospect, my parents were so against me dating in my early teen years—but I did it anyway behind their back. Looking back, I am glad I did this because I have learned some good and bad things. For example, out of my experiences, I have developed stressed coping mechanisms that come with relationship problems, finding balance, and forming relations in other areas of my life such as work, and socially.

I find It interesting though how African parents are quick to allow their children to get married but are not keen on this dating process—which is of great importance in my opinion.

We live in a world today of Facebook, Instagram, and alcohol—a world fueled by dopamine addiction. Dating should not be perceived as bad, but rather a vital experience young people should freely experience.



2 thoughts on “Why Is Dating A Taboo For Most Africans?

  1. From what I can tell, dating (or “courtship”) traditions in Africa vary widely. There is no general rule that African parents don’t like their children to date. But there is a strong tradition in Africa of arranged marriages. In these cases, the children do not get to pick their spouses; someone else does that. From reading a few articles it is pretty clear that in traditional Africa, attaining a marriage is very important, as this is a stable relationship that can produce and raise children. In this context, Western-style dating may seem frivolous or a waste of time to many Africans.

    I know that people who come to Western lands from places more steeped in tradition enjoy the “free” ways they find there. But we must remember that with freedom comes responsibility. Actually, the more responsible you are willing to be, the freer you can be.

    • Lecox thank you for your comment.
      Dating and marriage within the African communities is a long process. I love and respect the culture and the traditions, sometimes I wish somethings if parents can be lenient.

      I appreciate your comment. I enjoy comments because sometimes you can a different perspective etc.

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